I met up today with my friend Melissa Snark and Jennifer Carlson for lunch. We got together mostly to chat and hang out, but of course the subjects drifted over to the state of our writing projects. I was both looking forward to and dreading this part of conversation.
I’m in a shaky place confidence-wise at the moment. I’m doing a lot of world-building and world-fixing in this draft, and I’m hitting the point where I’m wondering if I’m creating more problems than I’m fixing. In dark corners of my mind, I hear a voice telling me that the story is one nobody would be interested in hearing. I’ve heard this voice before, and I know that it lies. It’s a damn insidious voice that most of the time I can ignore. I’ve been under stress and under deadlines the last few weeks, so it’s been harder to drown out with positive thoughts. I’ve been wondering if I’m on the right track, or if I have derailed myself.
Our conversation roved all over the place and came to my universe’s explanation of how werewolves came to be. In the middle of my explanation, I hear a female voice say, “That is an awesome idea!” Jennifer, Melissa, and I turn to look at the table behind us, where a man and woman are sitting. The woman grins a little sheepishly as I say, “Thanks!”
They had been keeping one ear on the conversation since we had been discussing the difference between high and low fantasy. We chatted for a few minutes and returned to our meals. Before they left, I handed them a business card.
I’m back at home, feeling confident. I’m looking at the story, searching the problems that need fixing. The little voice in the back of my head is still speaking, but it’s easier to ignore now. I know I’m on the right track.
P.S. If you’re the young woman I spoke with at El Camino Mongolian, I’m sorry I didn’t get your name. Thank you for giving me the shot in the arm my confidence needed so badly to make that voice shut up.
In the Bay Area May 23rd through the 26th? Want to hear about me talk about knitting? Want to see my latest costume in person? I will be at BayCon 2014 giving a panel on the inspirations and ideas that lead to my Best Workmanship and Best in Show costumes as well as participating in the Variety Show.